Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Is that a box on your head?

You take your 'normal' sized dog to the vet with an 'ouchie'. To keep him from biting at said 'ouchie' your vet will probably give you the Elizabethan Collar like the following picture depicts:

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When your dog is a 'large' breed dog maybe your vet doesn't have a Elizabethan Collar big enough for his big ole 34" neck. Maybe your vet will get creative to find something to go around that big ole neck. Maybe your vet will come up with something like this:

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Poor guy!
Side note: this is not my dog. But it is a friend of my sister in law's dog. It is not some cruel sick joke to rid a large dog of his peripheral vision.

Monday, May 14, 2007

First time mama drama

Yet again on this trip called motherhood, I am to the point where AKL and I are at a stalemate.

Example: AKL wants to draw with a pen on some paper. I let her. When AKL starts drawing everywhere with said pen I take the pen away as I do not want pen everywhere. I know the easy answer is 'don't give her the pen in the first place' but the same situation would also happen with a crayon, pencil, marker, quill. What happens post 'take the pen away' is what I like to call 'a dramatic interpretation of a crazy baby'. We throw ourselves back, we cry and scream, we WANT THE PEN BACK YOU STUPID CRACK!!!!!

This happens anytime something happens to AKL that she does not agree with. In her little head she says "Do I want my diaper changed right now? NO. So I shall scream and try to get away!!! HA HA HA HA!!!" I know, she's 15 months, she doesn't know that many words but you get the jist of what I am saying.

So any of you seasoned mothers out there with the knowledge of what to do during the 'tantrum stage' (shit I hope it's just a stage) please give me any words of wisdom :)

Monday, May 7, 2007

5 Questions

Since luvthebearcats was throwin down with the 5 questions post I had to step up and do it. No one has ever called me a chicken. Some might call me a 'quiet talker', some might call me a 'drunk' but never a chicken. So here goes!

1. If you could meet anyone in the world (dead or alive), who would it be?
Man this is a hard one!!!! There are just so many possibilities. Do you go with the hot celebrity just because you can? Do you go with the 'smart' answer and say a world leader? Or do you go the 'dead' route and pick the person who you think would have made a huge difference in this world if he was still alive? I just don't know. Since I don't know I will say Chuck Norris. He best not roundhouse kick me to the head though.

2. What is your dream job?
There are 2 separate things that I would love to be able to do with my life at the moment. One of these things is very tree huggery but hell that is who I am. First I would LOVE to be able to be home with my daughter more. Am I a stay at home full time mom? No. I know I would go crazy without having ample adult human contact. I would absolutely love to be a 'Part Time stay at home mother' though. With the other half of my time, now here's the tree hugger in me, I would love to work at/volunteer for a no kill animal shelter or other animal related not for profit. I know I'd be all sad if the dogs/cats didn't get adopted...but hell at least the lil dudes wouldn't get put to sleep.

3. What is your favorite childhood memory?
I think one of my favorite childhood memories is when the man god and most awesome singer in the world Jack Wagner came and did a concert at Worlds of Fun. 'Frisco' was a HOTTIE back in the day and good ole luvthebearcats and I were all about him. Sure mine was a young love, as I was probably like 6 or 7 when he came, but that didn't mean it wasn't pure. Luvthebearcats had all of his tapes and we would listen to them over and over again. Hell I could probably still sing each and every word to you. I did have the added bonus of being so small that I couldn't see him so I sat on my fathers shoulders to watch. You know he saw me....you know it.

4. If you could change your name, what would you change it to and why?
If I could change my name to anything it would be Anastasia. BUT you would need to pronounce it 'An-A-Sta-Se-A'. I would also wear frilly dresses and carry a parasol. Twirl Twirl Twirl.

5. If you won the lottery today, what would you do tomorrow?
I'd quit my job. That was easy!!!

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

The hyper hypo kid

This could...quite possibly....be the best SNL skit ever. I ran across it on YouTube so I decided to share the joy. Don't pee from laughing when you are watching it. If you do please see my first post and follow the instructions given.